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Stay Awake

by Woke Up Older

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1.
Spring Tide 03:27
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I can see you try to reach me I missed your call again There’s no one else to blame but me It’s not your fault I’m distant I can see you start to smile Your tongue between your teeth You can’t pronounce your W’s They all come out like V’s And I’ve never felt so distant Everyone I know is asleep in different time zones I just wait from the other side I feel you slip and I can’t stop it Your calls’ painting more things red Lost and left for dead Down the hall, across the world What’s the difference if I can’t tell you I love you I guess that’s just what loss is I’ve been waking up each day to find I’m crying in my sleep The torrents haven’t stopped all year They swept me off my feet It’s not romantic, it’s a tragedy I guess I’m overdue for something Hit the gym on Sunday morning I’m lost inside my head In the coastal town of Bergen An ocean from my friends No one comes at this time So all the weight is free For me to lift until I’m broken To carry till I’m weak I’ve been staring at your ashes on the mantle I’ve been wrestling with ghosts I’ve been holding out on God because I miss you This whole damn year has challenged everything I know Down the hall, across the world What’s the difference if I can’t tell you I love you I guess that’s just what loss is I’ve been waking up each day to find I’m crying in my sleep The torrents haven’t stopped all year They swept me off my feet It’s not romantic, it’s a tragedy This time I played it over in my head Couldn’t remember what you said You wandered off in my mind like A ghost in the wake of the tide And this time I played it over in my head Couldn’t remember what you said You wandered off in the sunlight You disappeared in the red
2.
Drone 02:49
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Stay awake I close my eyes, feel everything at once Fade to grey You put your faith on needles end The hemlock’s in your blood I can start to make out imprints on the floor From months of laying still I feel like I’ve lost all that I fought for Getting out of bed each day still kills me In the morning All I think about is you I made an army of angels in my carpet Guardians in my living room I don’t know why I’m not letting this go, I spent these six months on my own And I’ve got nothing to show for it I don’t know why I’ve been feeling so low And every day just seems to drone On disappointments I can’t outgrow And it feels like I haven’t slept in weeks Because each time I close my eyes I drown silent in apathy Choke on every opportunity to be the man, That you need me to be Second chances, ghosts and memories Spending hours chasing shadows between the sheets I still see you in the retina static too You hung yourself with the slack I gave you You found a temporary fix For all your problems But it turned into a permanent solution Now I’m dealing with the aftershock That comes from time to time I’m still wrestling these anxious thoughts That haunt me in the night I haven’t changed at all inside I don’t know why I’m not letting this go, I spent these six months on my own And I’ve got nothing to show for it I don’t know why I’ve been feeling so low And every day just seems to drone On disappointments I can’t outgrow I slowly watched your best years wash away Like a Monterey sunrise I shouldn’t be surprised it never came You said that this was it and that you’d Change
3.
5 North 02:40
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The world starts shrinking slow Collapsing like a pinhole And brother don’t you know There’s no promise for tomorrow It was just weeks ago Driving home on 5 north You said when it was time You were ready to go It looked like you were sleeping You were gray and freezing cold I finally saw your face Brushed over like a wax made fake I knew it wasn’t you Just the skin you shed on your way You said that we should dance But it’s hard to find the strength to I know you’re better off this way Just don’t forget we miss you Rainfall of flowers on your grave Each bud a heart that you had changed Loosened my grip on the chrysanthemum they gave me Watched it slowly fall away I watched you slowly fall away It’ll never be the same
4.
Oil Stains 04:56
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I should’ve seen the ice breaking in the shattered glass of your car windshield Should’ve known you were sick, It’s too early to fall asleep at the wheel I should’ve known when the nosebleeds came more frequent When the cold sweats kept you awake at night I stood and watched at a distance Where the setting sun began to rise It haunts me And I stood still In the house that I grew up in The living room is littered still With your chipotle bags and napkins As your oil stains on our driveway Fade away When you went home that night I didn’t even say goodbye I should’ve known it was the last time I watched your memory fade away Just like your engines oil stains Your car wreck left before it towed away It haunts me No I lay restless every night These last six months have just flown on by Years of twin creeks football on my mind I should’ve seen the tides changing The waves start to recede If I’d have spoken up they might have come again But I stood still In the house that I grew up in The living room is littered still With your chipotle bags and napkins As your oil stains on our driveway Fade away When you went home that night I didn’t even say goodbye I should’ve known it was the last time I watched your memory fade away Just like your engines oil stains Your car wreck left before it towed away It haunts me I thought back through the story of the life you lived Dove headfirst into everything you did And that’s why I loved it The restless nights ease up as each new day goes by As I learn to forgive myself well you, You walk with Jesus I’ve been running with you for so long I’m still keeping pace Now that you’re gone I’m still following The tracks that you left in the snow As you wandered off alone In the sunset swallowed in red And covered in flowers cast for the dead As they put you to bed in the ground I lay here too Sobbing in my bathroom So throw open the door Let the monsters all out Watch the light flooding into my parents house As the sky turns to gray I want to believe that nothing's really changed but it has now I’m learning every day to stand like you I’ll keep holding down the fort but I’ll see you soon When I walk with Jesus too

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released April 23, 2019

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Woke Up Older Los Angeles, California

California pop-punk/emo. 5 North out 4/21, welcome to SALS.

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